AN INDECENT DESCENT (A Voyage)

Introduction

This image of the world is mine. I realized that humans had similar thoughts. I knew that I had to call this to your attention after reading the preface to “The Order of Things; An Archaeology of the Human Sciences” by Michael Foucault. I paraphrase him:

“out of the laughter that shattered .  ..   … all the familiar landmarks my thought – our thought, .  ..   …   breaking up all the ordered surfaces  .  ..   … and planes .  ..  … and threaten our distinctions between Same and Other .  ..   … This passage [from one of Jorge Luis Borges’ stories] quotes a certain Chinese encyclopedia in which it is written that animals are divided into [the following categories]:

 

Belonging to the Emperor

Embalmed

Tame

Suckling pigs

Sirens

Fabulous

Stray dogs

Included in present classification

Frenzied

Innumerable

Drawn with a very fine camel hair brush

Et cetera

Just broken the water pitcher

That from .  ..  … a long way off .  ..   … look like flies

 .  ..   … that by a great leap  .  ..   …  the fable  .  ..   …  [demonstrates]

 Another system of thought [that shows] the limitation of our own  .   ..   …”

Both Foucault and I were incited to new mental images by Borges. Foucault wrote a philosophical treatise. The best I could come up with was my autobiography. The following is that biography; my image of a world were truth is not what it appears to be and science is simply a rationale.

 

A VOYAGE

My name is “ w@Fz*T ” and I realize that it is hard to pronounce in any language. Therefore we can skip the formality and you can simply call me “2.”

I was all energy, pure energy; all of the time. You would say I was 100% energy – – – – but I would not. Yet I was all energy all of the time.

And I was all colors, all the time and you would say 100% of the time – – – – but I would not. Yet I was all colors all of the time.

But mostly, I was pure truth, all of the time. I would say I was totally and only truth. But you would not. You see, I could not speak truth for I could not speak. I could not think truth for I could not think. I simply knew what truth was. I contained truth. You would say I was 100% truth but I would only agree to being all truth.

I was continually orgasmic; all the time. It was pure ecstasy. All energy all colors, all orgasmic, all truthful; all the time.

But don’t confuse my orgasms with your sex; just like you are confusing your percentages with my being. Right now you believe that I total 400% – – – but I said “I would not.”

And please, do not confuse yourself by using your systems of math, order, or meta-whatevers in attempting to determine who I am. Just relax and come along for the ride. It will all become clear as we move along.

Like I started to say; I was all energy all of the time, all light all of the time, all colors all of the time, all truth and only truth all of the time, all orgasmic all of the time, all ecstasy all of the time, always vibrant all of the time, always brilliant (in all of its meanings) all of the time, always present, everlasting, eternal and using my built-in mobius map as a guide for my travels.

With all those attributes and no enemies, no destination, and being perfectly happy, I was not required to think. In fact; I had no capacity to think. You think thoughts; sometimes this is your end desire, only to think thoughts. I did not.

Do not jump to conclusions. There was One greater who preceded me; eternal also. Do not use your concept of time or you will only continue to confuse yourself. Just follow along – – – – – PLEASE.

So there I was, traveling on a perfectly straight path, always returning to where I had started. It was not boring for I had never been there before; even though it looked familiar.

Then one day (your solar tables not mine) there it was; right behind me. My Predecessor had left His earth right behind my path.

As I sped forward, totally lost in hind-site, my mobius map made both a left turn and a congruent flip on its parallel plane. I hurtled forward and tor-ward at the same time.

In all my brilliance, color and ecstasy I was heading for the eastern Atlantic. My latitudinal heading lined up between Baltica and Laurentia. As I closed in on earth my first bounce was at the coast line. A small waterway remained as I plowed through. I left a big rock standing to my left as I continued to grind my way eastward.

My colorful (magentas, heliotropes, oranges and yellows with small amounts of blue, red and green) brilliance and orgasmatronic energy reacted with Predecessor’s Earth. When it was done I had left a very large pock mark. It was hundreds of miles wide and thousands of miles long.

There I sat, pulsating in my full show of energy and brilliance; all of my colors, all of my truth, so full of anticipation that it spilled out onto the banks of the gulch that I had just created. Of course I was a bit peeved that He had left the Earth right in my path; the path that I had, so many times, never traveled before.

His Earth had always been there and so had I. Because we had always occupied the same space at the same time there was never any possibility of collision. It was when we did not occupy the same space at the same time that the possibility for collision became real. But that is neither here nor there;  .  ..   … nor am I   .   ..   … (nor were you).

As I sat there gathering my faculties of energy and non-matter it became apparent that a flood (NO – – – not THE flood, just A flood) of briny water rushed down the newly formed gulch and toward me. “Oh, this is going to be fun!” thought I. Well, I really did not think it because I was never able to think thoughts. After all, I was all feeling, all knowing, all brilliant, all ecstatic, always. There was no need to think. Likewise, I had always been here. There was no one to have animosity towards. No situations to create angst. No fear of the future or false laurels to lay on the past. Neither future nor past existed.

But that briny salty water was rushing towards me. As it swept past me my orgasmic pleasure meta-morphesized (no “meta” things existed at that time) into a sweet and beautiful pain. I was overwhelmed with joy. This pain was something new and wonderfully exciting. I had my first release. It was a mixture of color and energy. Moments later (your time frame not mine) a second shudder of pleasure swept over me. It was a release of pure instinct with a whole lot of truth.

As I lay there in the afterglow (really – – – – I did glow) something was occurring to me. My brilliance was slightly diminished, my color was more earth-tone, and my energy was abundant but no longer releasable.

I had divided into two blobs of gelatinous mass. There we (or is it I?) were (was) floating in the brine of the newly cut gulch. I no longer pulsated in brilliant colors but my clone and I could still emit a green-blue glow. And even though I could not release my energy I did discover something new. When I bumped into my glowing gelatinous clone (or bumped into myself you might say) floating near me we both released energy at the same time. It was almost orgasmic. Painfully pleasurable beauty.

And that was why I was still there; although somewhat diminished.

Oh well, it was a small price to pay for survival.

I remained floating between a large delta to my south (your polar coordinates, not mine) and a group of large rocky islands to my north. My mobius map was wet, soggy and useless.

My joy was overwhelming during the epochs that followed. And yes, the joy was in the concept of my language, not yours. Likewise, your epochs, not mine.

The briny became a little crowded before I realized what was going on. These random encounters of floating, glowing, gelatinous, blobulous clones all bumping into each other were followed by not so small increases in their bloberistic numbers. But I was proud because they were all me. I was an inner part of each one of them. All of my glorious features, albeit somewhat reduced, were in each one of them. I were they!

Epoch after epoch we multiplied asymptotically towards something you call infinity (what is it with you guys and this infinity thing?). Each blob was almost like me. Happy, even ecstatic at times, brilliant on multiple levels when considering luminescence, brain power to waste, color to some degree, and hue. And, oh yes, orgasmic when in pairs.

Even though God-zillions of us floated out of the passageway and back in to the Atlantic, there were simply too many blobs to make life perfect. A couple of more doublings in the population and we might not survive. Therefore a pact was made. It was agreed that any blob who had protuberances was required to crawl out into the primordial ooze and live there for the remainder of eternity (infinity – – – – eternity – – – – are they the same thing to you guys?).

But even with this reduction in living conditions, it was a small price to pay for survival.

Wouldn’t you just know it? The Devonian ooze dwellers morphed and multiplied and multiplied and morphed until there were so many variations and mutants that you could not keep track of them; even when using your counting system.

There were fuzzy ones, hairy ones, furry ones, mucous covered ones, scaley ones, feathery ones, ugly ones and cute ones. And they all had several things in common. First, they were happy. Second, they knew truth. Third, they were orgasmic, and fourth they were brilliant in every way except for emitting color. Oh, they had color. They just could not emit it. They couldn’t even glow! And one more thing before we leave this subject. Let’s switch item one with item three. Orgasmicness was more important than happiness.

Everyone was quite pleased with the situation for the first epoch. Then it happened. They started eating each other. Birds had to take to the air, primates to the trees, rodents and reptiles to their holes and amphibians to the water. Each felt safe in their own environment.

But they were only safe until the hominids began to roam amongst them. These upright creatures of a new epoch had several things in common. Oh! I said that before? Maybe we should review where we have been; just to keep it straight.

First there was the Previous One. Then I came along by myself. I was brilliant on all levels, colorful, orgasmic, joyful, ecstatic, eternal and all energy. And most important of all I did not think nor did I have reason to. After me came my clone and I. We had all the attributes of me except for emitting random energy and bright colors; we just did that cute little blueish-green glowing thing.

Second, my clone and I started multiplying. We all (or is it I all?) Found the water world becoming too crowded. I was happy and ecstatic and brimming with love; and selves. Some of us ended up in the ooze. There, we no longer emitted blue-green but simply reflected color. We fed off each other and engaged our instinct to avoid being eaten.

Third, thinking man arrived and really put the pressure on us. He made tools and plans that outweighed our instinct. He could plan an attack and carry it out before we knew what was happening. Yet, he was one of us.

How could this have happened? He was blood of our blood, flesh of our flesh, yet he had the capability to look into the future and also review the past. We had no concept of past or future.

But we had feeling, deep feeling. We were truthful, happy, eternal, ecstatic, reflective (not the thinking kind of reflective but the light ray kind of reflective), orgasmic and energetic. Thinking man had the ability to look ahead a few steps and behind a few steps. He made his plans and he made his corrections. He still contained the attribute of emotion; however diminished it was. This combination of foresight, hindsight and emotion, at times, made him morose. Why? Because he could conceptualize, remember and then feel guilty about his mistakes.

A comparison might be in order here. For example, if we (the original ones) were eaten it was just fine. We never saw it coming and did not much care. But man knew when beasts chased him. The ruckus was just horrible; running through the brush screaming and the gnashing of teeth (NO, not man’s teeth, but rather, the beasts). Man knew two steps into the future when he was doomed. Man knew when he had made an error in the past. He used his ability of thought to avoid repeating mistakes and to plan attacks farther into the future. This made him gloomy because he was not able to fully enjoy the present.

His being was diminished; but this was a minor price to pay for survival.

As the eons sailed by, man honed his ability of thought to a finer edge. He controlled fire and hewed lithics. He hid in his cave and emerged only to kill. He used all of his free cave time to think thoughts and procreate; for he was still orgasmic, he still knew ecstasy at times, and even had time for a small amount of happiness.

But thinking about the next animal he was going to kill was not enough. He had to communicate it to his hunting pals. “Ugh” was not a clear enough communication. Depending on the intonation “Ugh” could mean “deer”, “fire”, or “I think your gal looks really sexy;” at which time the clubs would appear.

So man invented art as the second form of communications. A combination of “Ugh” and finger pointing was the first form of communications. Man drew deer on the cave wall. He brought his hunting buddies over and pointed at it with the normal corresponding “Ugh.” They all got the idea and the emotions flowed; the beauty of nature outside the safety of the cave, the excitement of the hunt, the knowledge that they could all work together for the kill. But best of all was bringing the food back to their gals and getting that orgasmic payoff.

With all this racing through their minds they became excited and started leaping around, jumping, hopping from ledge to ledge. It was a glorious thing; this image of a deer on the wall. It made them feel alive in their dark and smoky surroundings. Therefore it was repeated again and again, simply to recreate those emotions that they felt when observing the first piece of artwork.

Of course something else happened. Some bonehead decided to keep track of the number of deer that had been killed. He started marking little lines under the picture; one for each kill. It took away from those emotions created by viewing the original deer art. But it did help man to know how many deer he had killed in each newly established hunting territory.

So it was that man first found abstractions in his world. Because of his ability to think he had to tamper with the beauty of communicating with art. He had to communicate by using the world of numbers and abstractions. The embryo of science was born and there was no taking it back.

Even if man’s happiness was diminished, it was a small price to pay for survival.

“Thinking man” had lost the innocence of art over the next few eons. He moved out into the open. He no longer had any natural enemies; other than himself. He left his cave, his innocence and a lot of his emotions behind. Art and abstractions gave way to civilization; however uncivilized it was to become.

When I look back as to how ecstatic and thoughtless (not your thoughtlessness, but mine) and orgasmic I was, and now, how man is only a minor orgasmic being, controlled by his orgasms, how he must think, think, think all of the time, when he could just be floating around in space and emitting brilliant colors and energy, my happiness as opposed to his drivenness is a sad comparison.

Man is no longer innocent. In addition to abstractions man has added logic. This great feat allows him to nail his science to the church door. His thinking has gone circular; for all he has done with this logic is to rationalize his science.

But he is pleased with himself in this peculiar folly. He has determined that the Predecessor is a creation of his own human mind. His ego demands more. If he has created the Predecessor then he has the right to   .   .   .   .   kill the Predecessor.

No matter how diminished he was, it seemed a small price to pay for survival.

 

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About Waldo "Wally" Tomosky

I am proud of my work life (not the jobs, just the work).  Bait monger  Lawn mower  Paper boy  Windshield cleaner in a drive-in theater (if you don't know what a drive-in theater is there is no sense in you reading any farther)  Snack shack janitor in a drive in theater (ditto for drive-in theater)  Milling machine clean-up boy in a tool and die shop  Plastic injection press operator  Centurion in the US Army  Factory hand  Apprentice boy  Tool and die maker  Software user manual writer  Computer programmer  Ex-patriate par excellence  Engineering manager  Software test manager  Retiree  University administrator  System analyst  Retiree (2nd try)  Licensed amateur paleontologist  Retiree (3rd try)  Shovel bum (archaeology)  Retiree (4th try)  Delivery driver  Retiree (5th try)  Graduate student (skipped AA and BA due to the level of difficulty)  Retiree (finally got the drift of it) I have been writing for fourteen years and have fifteen books on Amazon/Kindle. Some horror, some twisted, some experimental, some essay and a few historical. I think that now I will really, really, really retire and just write. Lets see if I can do retirement correctly this time!
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